is there some sort of support group i can join?

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

Chuck Norris once inhaled a seagull.
[What???]

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Right. OK, to get something to show up on Google, I have to have a link to it that says the thing I want to show up on Google? Is that how it works?
Radio Free Dodo

And also:
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
(I. Can't. Stop.)